This was published in Malaysakini sometime ago. Sharing it here because after all this time it still seems to be relevant. There would be some things that I would like to add and chage to this, and will do so when time permits. 

Focus on country, not homosexuality 
Seethalakshmi S | 4:18PM Jul 21, 0 

The recent heat on homosexuality in Malaysia has got most everyone reeling and mind you, some of them don’t take to it kindly.

The government - with the help of mainstream media - has been on a spree to shed a negative light on homosexuality with baseless, degrading news and comments.

It would be good if the powers-that-be could at least perform simple research before mindlessly jumping to conclusions based on fear and hate. In fact, if they take a little trouble, they would find that research and studies have already been conducted - they just need to look it up.

I firmly believe that their non-acceptance is due to the lack of understanding of the subject matter. It’s human nature to reject, fear and hate what we do not understand. Just like it’s in the nature of a person if they are homosexual/heterosexual/bisexual - it is neither a choice nor a trend.

Being homosexual myself, I know the trials and tribulations we face in society and it isn’t easy. Do you really think I would choose something so difficult? Sexuality is a complex issue and asking someone to change their sexuality is not like changing your clothes. Homosexual one day, heterosexual the next.

Sexuality - be it hetero, homo or bi - is fixed. It’s as fixed as the colour of our eyes. It is not a trend. We do not become left-handed because it is a trend, we just are born that way.

The above statement is based on scientific tests. We could go into great detail but so doing would require a completely separate letter. To cut a long story short, we already know that it is our chromosomes - XX or XY - that make out our physical gender to be either female or male.

What most of us don’t know is that it is the hormonal (androstendione and testosterone) make-up in the hypothalamus of a person that makes us either hetero or homosexual. The bottom line is hat it is in the genes.

If it is perfectly normal to be heterosexual, then it is perfectly normal to be homosexual.

It is not a mental illness. In 1973, the American Psychiatric Association (APA) officially declassified homosexuality as being a mental illness. The American Psychological Association followed suit in 1975.

The APA is opposed to any therapy designed to change a person’s sexual orientation. In 1998, the APA president stated: ‘There is no scientific evidence that reparative or conversion therapy is effective in changing a person's sexual orientation. There is, however, evidence that this type of therapy can be destructive’.

The APA has also ceased to characterise homosexuality as a disease as there is no clinical evidence that homosexual activity results in any more destructive behavior than persons engaging in heterosexual activity.

Narrowing homosexuality down to merely a sexual act is perverse. A homosexual’s life includes more than just sex. We are whole persons with lives that include more than just sexual activity.

We deserve as much rights as the next person to be able to love and live without fear. Yes, we maybe in love with the same gender but it is love nevertheless.

I am totally opposed to the idea that homosexuality is morally demeaning to society. 

Homosexuals are capable of as much love and care as heterosexuals. Besides, it is not a homosexual that rapes women or kidnaps young girls, which is the real problem in society.

It would be great if we could focus on the real problems the country is facing rather than what consenting adults do with their lives.

http://m.malaysiakini.com/letters/86478

it gets better in malaysia

This is the first of 15 videos shot by Jay Sheldon. Thanks to Pang (seksualiti merdeka) for starting this off and rallying us together.



go on make your own video.

being OUT. being LOUD. being PROUD.

Here I am putting pen to paper, or rather fingers to keyboard, after a long time. Why? Because it is time for me to share a part of me with you, in hopes that it might help someone else like me know they are not alone.

In recent times over a couple of years, I have come out to most of the people closest to me. People whom I felt could be trusted and could deal with the information I handed them. These included a handful of family and friends.

Obviously, it was not all rosy and pink.

Most people… most not all, have been very understanding, supportive and did not go into panic seizures. You know who you are, thank you and I love you all.

There were/are some who were/are rude and irritating and when push comes to shove well, you sometimes have to shove back.

Then there are those who want to remain ignorant to the fact, keep living in denial, and think they have it all figured out… You don’t! In reality you have never known me and you never will for as long as you deny the fact that is as clear as day.

So… why is it so important to come out?

Coming out is a very liberating, soul lifting experience. Simply because after years of living a lie and trying to be something you are not we finally start being true to ourselves and do not have to hide an innate part of our being from the people closest and dearest to us.

What I have come to learn is that somehow the coming out process never ends. There is always someone new who needs to be told. There is always someone who needs to be reminded, because people tend to conveniently forget.

I do know this though; no matter how many times you come out and regardless to whether the reaction is negative or positive, it still always feels excellent to be true to yourself.

A message to LGBTIQ who are still in the closet:

Do yourself and others like you a favor… Come out already.

As a minority, the silence not only kills you it kills us all. People need to know we exist. People need to know that they deal with us on a daily basis and we are not any different from heterosexuals. They need to see that we lead completely normal lives that do not affect them in anyway.

A word of advice for those of you who have never come out and plan to, be prepared to be bombarded with a string of questions. Answer them only if you feel comfortable, you are not obligated to answer questions that are too personal or abusive. Oh! Oh! And be prepared for the legendry question “when did you choose to be… mmm... ehem… gay” and the legendry reply “the same time you chose to be straight”

A message to heterosexuals in the dark:

It is not a phase and it is not going to change. This is who we are. We exist and have existed for centuries.

It is not a trend, oh my! what a difficult trend would this be to follow. Why in heavens name would you think we would be following a trend when it makes our lives so hard.

It is not the media. Golly, I should be straight as a ruler if it was media influence. Think about it, the only thing the media exposes us to 24/7 is heterosexuality and not homosexuality. I’m still gay!

Keep in mind when someone dear to you comes out to you and you choose to ignore it, you are also choosing to shut yourself out of important parts of their lives. Instead of being part of their life, you would instead be pushing them further and further away.

Open your eyes and open your mind. You will see that we are no different from you. You will realize that we love with our hearts just like you. You will learn that we can live together in harmony.

GLBT History Month 2009

End Homophobia

this video was made based on a poem called "i am", i have no idea who wrote it but it speaks volumes. there are many versions of this poem on youtube check it out if you like.

homophobia is a sickness that needs a cure.

p.s. love is never wrong

p.p.s. this is not my video and i do not own rights to it.